Thursday, February 25

In the bottle ...

The writing prompt for this week's Theme Thursday is "Bottle".

Photo from Onexposure (Fisherman’s Bottle — Leon).
Through a glass lightly

I put a bottle in a message
and listened for their rhyme.
I drained the mirror of quicksilver,
nightfall vapors forgive me this crime.

The gaping yawn there beyond
sprays salt mist on my closed eyes.
The surf goes in and now comes out
giggling foam at my heart halved lies.

I laugh at my vast echo and
trawl the depths of her silent reply,
while the wind whisks away colors
from loams of plants that in still nights still sigh.

Above the hic-cusp of a wave I search the sparkler night,
peering empty and free through a coddled telescope.
Cassiopeia twirls her hair and ponders me,
turning and dissolving in my bottle kaleidoscope.

The swaying sea beckons sorrow
on waves swinging low and long.
I hold a trembling conch to her starry ear
so she hears my throbbing song.

But for all my madness the sea
she refuses to stop loving me.
I lay down in the weeds of her cool sand
tracing a fevered tree grown ever free.

Leafless driftwood stretches twigging roots
down into shingled ripples of frothed brine.
I put a bottle in a message and
then I made her this rhyme.

Photo: Alone, by Fatemah Choopani from Onexposure 

To see what other bloggers participating in Theme Thursday have uncorked this week click here.

23 comments:

  1. "Cassiopeia twirls her hair and ponders me..."

    So that's where she's been hiding. ;)

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  2. Such wonderful images are mine to ponder now!

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  3. Yes, Jeff, that's where she's been hiding, right there in slain plight, I mean in plain sight...

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  4. Hi, EG. Yes you can ponder Cassiopeia, one goddess to another...

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  5. I love that you put the bottle in the message. And the notion of Cassiopeia twirling her hair is just delightful. It's been too long since this land locked Midwestern girl has seen the sea!

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  6. Love the imagery here, Lorenzo! But I admit to getting side-tracked by your other posts, heh...

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  7. Good twist around on the message in the bottle concept...

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  8. "I drained the mirror of quicksilver". Lovely. I would be really proud of a line like that.

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  9. Full of energy and sparkling images, gorgeous!

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  10. You have some well thought out lines here. Great job! :) The Bach

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  11. Lorenzo:
    There is a certain transparency into some one's soul when they write poetry. Often we draw upon our own experiences when we sit down to write about it, whether in poems, prose, or a fictional essay. There is a dreamlike and reflective quality in your poetry referring to (I drained the mirror of quick-sliver) that drew me in and I became possessed by the mysterious beauty that seem to have sprung from the depth of your soul and mirrored in the ocean's vastness. A Beautiful poem.
    Joanny
    Yes I did check out Fern Hill -- and got lost reading some of your other posts as well
    magpie tales - matches http://thedowsersdaughter.blogspot.com/2010/02/matches.html

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  12. Thanks everybody. On this post I have chosen to reply to comments by making the rounds on all your blogs. I think I got everyone. It was a rewarding go-round.

    Niamh, thanks. Your comment means a lot coming from a "real" poetess.

    Joanny: I am touched by your kind words. By the way, I love the title of your blog "The Dowser's Daughter". I have a friend here in Spain whose father was a dowser. The Spanish equivalent of dowser is 'zahorí', a beautiful word that ultimately derives from the Arabic "azzuharah" or Venus.

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  13. visually stunning with your words...love the play in their ordering as well, but i guess love will do that...

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  14. Hey, Brian, thanks. Yes, love will do that, as will mirrors and drinking ...

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  15. I love this one; very layered and complex.

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  16. wonderful images - including the sky in the first photo!

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  17. What an incredibly gorgeous photo to go with your poetry.

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  18. gorgeous words....which wove in me a tremendous urge to visit the sea....alas, for now will have to make do with a lake, a great lake, but a lake none-the-less.

    happy theme thursday!

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  19. Lorenzo:
    Thanks for telling me about the meaning of dowser -- I studied about dowsing history and for some reason did not learn that information --- now I know-- and it is wonderful I love the meaning of the word...in the last analysis ="Arab meaning for Venus."
    I wonder if you have time if you would read my post on this last magpie and give me your opinion? it is a short essay not beautiful poetry or prose --alas I envy those like yourself who have that gift..
    http://thedowsersdaughter.blogspot.com/2010/02/matches.html
    Best
    Joanny

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  20. Lorenzo this is so beautiful - the first line had me gripped - and like Willow I have not seen the sea in far too long.
    The last photo is so beautifully complementary as well... the sea and the desert, and the myth of the nymph. Gracias!
    I loved the exhibition by Colbert too - lucky Willow to receive the film from you. How kind and thoughtful!

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  21. For . . . But for all my madness the sea
    she refuses to stop loving me
    , and for the bottle in the message, I love this poem.

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