Thursday, June 3

Walk-in closet — 55 flash fiction Friday

King of Bees — © Rizal Adi Dharma
A traditional healer from Cibubur, West Java.
Finally told him
just blurted it out

He didn’t say nothing
for a long time
reeeeal long

Not a word

He hugged me
said ‘I love you son’
and cried some

Then he told me
when he was young,
before mom
Damn! man,
was he ever sobbing
‘there was this guy
once …’

* * *

This is a flash fiction piece for '55 Flash Fiction Friday'. The idea is to tell a story in 55 words. To try one yourself and read others go see g-man.


  1. wondering what he said...

    the photograph is one I don't want to look at yet cannot look away.

  2. Have you seen the new McDonald's ad, the one in France? That's what this reminds me of. (

    Amazing what you can squeeze into one of these, Lorenzo.

    The photo image is strangely powerful with this flash fiction-poem. Heal thyself.

  3. I kind feel haunted now.
    Which speaks of the power of words.

  4. this could go a couple ways...but i am glad dad still loves him...

  5. I want more!! Can't we just stretch the 55 words to double that?! Just this once...

  6. California Girl: Yes, I had the same reaction to the photo.

    Ruth: I am loathe to say anything less than terrible about McDonalds, but I have to admit the ad is great. I had not seen it before. Wonder if they will run that ad in Kansas.

    I had my doubts about using the photo with this post. Certainly, there is no 'direct' link between the two, but somehow it seemed fitting to me. Perhaps it has something to do with situations that repel and frighten, but demand we question those very reactions. Don't know why but I liked pairing the two together.

    Deb: Have a happily haunted weekend!

    Brian: Yes, a couple of ways. Although the unexpected twist at the end is fictional, the piece was inspired by talks I have had with a few gay friends discussing how hard it was for them to come out of the closet. A couple told me that telling their dad was the single hardest thing they had done in their lives. On the whole the reaction was much better than they expected, but not as surprising as the speaker's in this piece!

    Terresa: Rules are rules, ma'am.

  7. I am including a link to the advertisement mentioned by Ruth. You can find it here.

  8. A good dad will always understand.

  9. We have been telling our son since he was 12, if he's gay its fine. We say it after every girlfriend but does he thank us. Here's mine

  10. Lorenzo...
    This was a brilliant bit of 55 writing.
    You nailed the essence of the theme PERFECTLY!
    I'm sure it will be one of my favorites of the day.
    Thanks for playing, thanks for visiting, and have a Kick Ass Week-End...G


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