Friday, May 21

Bearing witness for karma

Prosecutor:
All night? He made love to you the entire night?

Witness:
Yes.

– A man with prostate cancer?

– He did stop to pee.

– And the fact the insurance company’s office was firebombed the same night the accused learned his coverage was denied, you just call that a coincidence?

– No, I call it karma. Instant karma.

* * *

Click to enlarge. Photo: PoiPoi — Bogdan Pedovich
Legal disclaimer: This is a fictional piece for '55 Flash Fiction Friday', where participants are required to tell a story in 55 words. The Alchemist's Pillow neither engages in, advocates nor condones perjury, arson or inopportune pee breaks and disclaims all liability for any such acts. All claims or queries should be addressed to g-man.

Post-edit: I have been affectionately pestered by threats of a paternity suit, something or other about a daughter of memory muse. I deny everything, but am linking this post to the 10th Daugther of Memory site.

36 comments:

  1. I love instant karma...and your disclaimer! I'll go address g-man now.

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  2. The same night as the girl in G-Mans piece...?
    The same night my wife had a 'headache'...

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  3. And we all shine on..
    Like the Moon
    And the Stars
    And the Sun!
    And your 55 Lorenzo...
    Excellent contribution My Friend.
    Thank you for playing, I hope that you found this to be a fun challenge. Please join us again next week, and have a Kick Ass Week-End.
    Galen

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  4. I'm so pleased to have found your blog and I love your 55. Very clever and the disclaimer is so funny. I totally believe in Karma.

    And I love the Proust quote.

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  5. ha. brilliant. nice alibi as well...so was she smiling? i guess that could be entered into evidence. nice 55.

    mine is up!

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  6. I'll bet that instant karma got helped a little.

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  7. creative and fun!
    excellent 55.

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  8. "He did stop to pee."

    Best line ever. Stopped me cold, woke me up. Loved it.

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  9. The disclaimer is as terrific as your 55!

    Mine is at: http://rnsane.blogspot.com/2010/05/lifes-journey-flash-55-friday-5-21-10.html

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  10. hahahaha...you have an awesome sense of humor!
    brilliant 55!
    hugs
    shakira

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  11. These 55s are making me need to get my head examined or ...

    mine is up

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  12. Thanks everybody for the positive comments and to the new "faces" I see here: welcome to the pillow. I will be making the rounds later today to your blogs.

    In keeping with the spirit of Flash 55, the disclaimer is also 55 words (and also the spirit of verbiose legalese, where disclaimers are as long as or longer than the documents).

    Brian: Was she smiling? Not only was she smiling, she was dancing and skipping through fire hoops, as shown in the picture.

    Alice: Yes, karma is a force to be reckoned with but, even so, it can always use a little "aiding and abetting".

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  13. lorenzo - great piece of writing - funny and earthy. steven

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  14. Funny piece, Lorenzo, and and one that certainly resonates with me, living as I do in a country where the health insurance companies continue to make exorbitant profits while doing everything within their powers to deny coverage to anyone with an illness. The disclaimer was a nice touch.

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  15. Hi, Steven, and thanks. Hopefully we have seen the first steps made in the US so that in the future no more "funny" pieces can be written about the dire consequences of denials of coverage and other abuses.

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  16. George: As I said in my reply to Steven's comments, perhaps we have taken a first albeit meek step toward putting those kinds of abuses behind us. I thought of you when I wrote the disclaimer. Such disclaimers are important for keeping litigation down, now that you've retired from the law (or so I believe I have understood from your blog profile).

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  17. i absolutely love this!! thank you for the smiles on this dismal Friday morning. i hope you have a wonderful weekend,
    laughing smiles,

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  18. WOW! What a man is he.....that only did he have time to "stop to pee" "she was dancing and skipping through fire hoops," Great 55 er there Lorenzo.
    Sounds like good Karma to me.

    Enjoy your week-end with your lovely family Lorenzo.

    Joanny

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  19. Hi Lorenzo ... What goes around comes around hey!
    A fun read & I love the alibi!!
    It's been nice visiting your pillow...have a great weekend!

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  20. i loved this! hopped over from talk at the table... and funny, but i had karma on my post today, too! :)

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  21. Great post, and I love the Legal Disclaimer along with it. Well done.

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  22. I am enjoying your spin on these Flash 55s. Spunky women you created there. Liked her. Smart narrator, leaving himself a legal out if needed. Hah!

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  23. I love it!!! "He did stop to pee" made me nearly fall out of my chair (from laughter). I love a writer with a sense of humor. You have also given me a great alibi for the next time the cops ask me where I was on the night in question...haha!

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  24. Julie: where would we be without laughter? Can't even bear the thought. Try to stay away from the cops, good alibi or not. Are you still considering doing a 44 piece yourself?

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  25. Hehehe. You should link this to the latest 10thDoM Muse. It totally works.

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  26. I have heard from a reliable source that you ought to link this at Tenth Daughter. I am inclined to agree :). Come on, Lorenzo! Indulge your fans!

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  27. Karma seems like the pain of guilt showing up in a form unrecognizable to the deserving offender without their ever having felt guilt — they only feel unfair treatment by life.

    Great intro to 10th DOM

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  28. Great fun Lorenzo.

    And how long was that pee break anyway?

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  29. Jeff and Amy (She Writes): OK, you convinced me, I have linked to the 10th Daughter of Memory.

    Yodood: Hello and welcome. I think this particular fate was a bit heavyhanded to qualify for your apt definition of karma.

    Barry: Why do you ask? You're not going to challenge a little lapis lazuli elephant to a pissing contest, are you?

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  30. This was so funny, Lorenzo! You definitely caught me off guard with this one - the pee line is hilarious!

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  31. Oh my word! Too busy laughing! Thank you!

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  32. Hi, Lorenzo. Yes, I'm thinking about it, but I doubt any I do will be worth showing. Your piece here is awesome and has such a nice natural flow (no, I'm not just kissing up). I've read a lot of them, and some just seem stiff. This has a great conversational rhythm.

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  33. Hi Margaret and hvinhell, nice to see you here and glad you enjoyed the flash 55er.

    Julie: some people do poems for their flash 55. I am sure you would come up with something moving and meaningful given the fine poetry I am happily discovering on your blog.

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